These questions give me pause as I struggle to become the best leader I can be.  I wonder what your experiences are?

There are several people whose extra efforts have meant the world to me throughout the years. I won't lie to you, my teenage years were hell. I was not considered a cute girl in school, and the other kids - well, I'm guessing that you all know just how friendly kids can be when they spot a self-esteem issue. I was like bait on a hook. What saved me was the love and friendship of an amazing woman named Sheila.  Sheila had neither the time nor the need to befriend me, her husband was the pastor of our church so her schedule was hectic and her critics were many.  Sheila couldn't care less. She taught me that you don't have to care about the judgments of others, so long as you know that you are right with yourself and your maker.

Sheila was followed by several amazing supervisors, and honestly - I must have been the luckiest employee in the world to have learned from so many willing teachers. From my time at MCI to my present employer I have had the honor of working with some very capable leaders. These are people that understand that it doesn't take monumental gestures to mentor someone willing to learn.  Eager students are encouraged by simple lessons - give us an hour a month and we will repay you with our successes.

Mentoring can be personal or professional, so long as it is positive. Take some time to teach someone how to ride a bike, how to give an interview - or how to counsel an employee.  Walk by an employee's desk and remember their name - USE IT NEXT TIME YOU SEE THEM.  Take the time to ask about their dreams and help them get there, if they'd like.  I'd wager that someone once did it for you, as they did for me. 

Take the good that you learn and teach it to the ones that come after you.

Oh, and Big Brothers Big Sisters of America is still looking for volunteers.

If we believe that individuals can become leaders, we must also believe to some extent that leadership, or some parts of it, can be learned. Successful people are not by default leaders. In fact, many executives have traits or characteristics that keep them from rising to the level of leader within their circle. (If you haven't already, please pick up a copy of What Got You Here Won't Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful by Marshall Goldsmith)  I point this out because I believe there are many that would become more active within their communities and organizations if they had confidence in their leadership potential. Grass roots leadership, servant leadership - these ideas are not about salesmanship alone. They are about influencing others with a heartfelt passion.  They are about action, volunteerism.

Everyday leaders are not the people we see on the 10:00 news.  (at least not on a regular basis) Everyday, citizen leaders are the men, women, and young people that volunteer at the community center for no glory at all. We rarely hear about all that they've accomplished, and yet they accomplish so much.  These are the leaders that we know so little about...and the leaders we should seek out.  These individuals have much to teach us about how to become good citizens. These lessons can be translated into both community and business - and they are lessons that will not lose their relevance over time.  

As managers, parents, brothers, and sisters we are tasked with the mentorship of those that come along behind us.  We promise them leadership and guidance, we assure them that their input is valuable and their thoughts - worth developing.  We ask them for their trust and their loyalty and in return we are to deliver back to them the benefit of our experience.  We pledge to the world our strength, morality, and the deliverance of just behavior. 

I can't help but sit back and wonder, after examining my own life (and if I am being honest, being a bit overly judgmental of others, too), how often are we able to put action behind our words?  Leadership is not a theory, nor is it a concept.  Leadership is a way of life. Leaders are not afraid of pissing off the pack. They understand that often, the pack is wrong.  How do we teach this to others?  How do we take a trait such as fearlessness and pass it down to the next generation?

In our promises to mentor others we commit ourselves to providing them with advice, guidance, and a helping hand on their path toward success.  We promise them our time and our honesty.  There are a number of mandated mentor / mentee relationships within corporate cultures, but if I am correct, there are few that provide actual benefit.  I receive emails from disappointed workers complaining that they have had only one or two meetings with their mentors within the last twelve months. On the flip side, mentors tell me that their organizations regulate the entire relationship -  making any of their efforts seem forced, scripted, and ultimately fruitless.

Organizations that wish to truly inspire change rather than merely pay lip service to it must find ways to allow for the creation of leaders.  Mentorship, in its true form, allows those blessed with leadership skills to teach those that are interested in learning.  For the follower, there is value in having learned management skills from one who is not afraid to teach the lessons.   

One reader commented to me that "Surely, if the executives at your friend's organization thought she was that valuable, she wouldn't be expected to plunge toilets. Maybe she thinks too much of herself." 

Another writes "Odd that you would choose this sort of theme for a leadership website."

Exactly my point. 

It is time that we change the way we think about the concept of leadership.  I believe it was Smartypants that posted earlier this week  that there seemed to be no great social leaders left. We are no longer encouraging the cultivation of maverick thought and creative invention.

Leaders come in all shapes, sizes, organizational situations, and classifications.  They are managers, receptionists, owners, and newly hired entry level employees.  All have a contribution to make.  Some will be brilliant, others will be mediocre but all will be worth hearing. 

Whether you subscribe to the trait theory of leadership or the more situational based theories, you will still think of some more inclined to follow in the footsteps of others than take up the charge themselves. That's okay... What we are missing in today's workplace, and yes, in society in general, is a willingness to look outside of the CEOs and political figures for our inspiration. Good ideas come from the most unexpected of places and often from the most unorthodox people...

You arrive home from work, emotionally exhausted from a day spent mediating employee squabbles, dodging complaints from employees about everything from the coffee to the retirement plan, and trying to negotiate a benefits package that won't break your organization's budget.  And yet, tomorrow morning you will get up with the alarm and do it all over again.

WHY?

There is a manager I know in Northern California that does a little bit of everything within her organization.  She plunges toilets.  Someone has to do it.  She also sweeps floors, washes dishes, and answers the phones.  What this wins her is a fall on double edged sword.  She knows the operations of the organization fluently.  She can help anyone do almost anything operational. She mentors all levels of employees, and has the respect of many (most) of her colleagues.  But she is also constantly undermined and talked down to by those considered to be her equals.  Why would this happen?

 It is easy to forget that the person you are talking to has two graduate degrees and a high level position within your organization when she is holding a plunger.  Moreover, people like my friend remind us that there are some out there who are willing to roll up their sleeves and do whatever it takes without complaint.  Many of us lack the dedication to go outside of our defined job responsibilities to take care of those around us.  Leaders like my friend take care of those around them so well that those around them often forget to appreciate it.

Throughout college we strive to be the best students we can. We study, we party, we sleep, then study some more. We graduate and enter the business world. And everything changes.

As business professionals we are expected to perform as members of a team not of our choosing. We are no longer measured simply on our own performance, we are required to act as a support system to people we may or may not socialize with outside of the office. These team members might be spectacular, or lazy, or ill-tempered.  So how then, are we expected to succeed?

Team settings can be extremely uncomfortable, and often downright intimidating. The person that can perform well in office team environments often finds that they do well in outside situations, as well. There are some fairly simple skills that you can utilize to make yourself an effective facilitator / team member.

1. Be the stick in the mud.  Okay, so this one is not so much fun, but work teams DO get sidetracked. Don't let your entire meeting pass with nothing accomplished outside of a brilliant re-hash of last night's "The Bachelor" episode. Maybe this is more fun, but it won't seem worth it when everyone has to come in on Saturday.  Keep the team focused and on-topic.

2. Be the voice of reason. Also, not as much fun as talking about TV, but still very necessary. People will disagree in meetings, this is perfectly normal. If, however, the conversation starts to get ugly it should be stopped. Preferably before someone throws a punch.

3. BEWARE THE BULLY - and don't let it be you.  Make sure everyone has a chance to speak their mind, even if their opinion isn't popular.

4. Be on time. Trust me on this one. No one likes the guy or girl that shows up late to every meeting. It's a sign that you don't respect their time or yours.

5. Take notes. Resolutions that are made within teams often go unfulfilled. Everyone leaves the meeting and forgets what assignments were given to them. Write everything down and update everyone via email after the meeting. This will ensure that no one is left with an excuse for not meeting their objectives.

The mastery of teamwork goes a long way toward building up our professional skills. It also teaches us how tailor our moods and responses to specific situations. These insulated work environments prepare us for uncomfortable client meetings, make us more comfortable speaking to crowds, and help us understand how to compensate for one another's short comings. (Likewise, how to take advantage of our co-worker's skill sets, when possible)

A successful professional life is not something you can achieve without learning how to work with others. Take advantage of these forced social experiments to acquire the skills you will need to go out and make things happen.

Human beings look for companionship in almost all activities, and being miserable at work is no exception. If one of us hates the boss we should all hate the boss, right? 

Sure, if we all want to be unemployed.

Grass roots leaders make a huge impact by making small changes.  Some examples:

1. Rather than join group rants, look for ways to propose solutions to the problems you hear most.  Realize that the folks ranting are frustrated.  There isn't anything wrong or abnormal about being frustrated with the copier that continues to eat your TPS reports. The leader will move on from the frustration, however, and find a way to kill the copier while no one is looking.

2. Congratulate your co-workers for a job done well. Be sincere. Everyone loves to be noticed for the things that they do well, and it need not be the head honcho that speaks up in order to make a difference.  Do this often enough, and it will begin to change the behavior of those around you.

3. Tattle Good.  If you are in a position to do so, tell the big guys about the contributions others are making. It makes them look good, it makes you look good. Executives WANT to know these things. They deal with unpleasant things all day, and it is nice for them to hear something other than a complaint.

4. Manage UP. You cannot change your boss, you can only change you.  At the end of the day, we can only truly develop our own leadership skills. Learn how to become an effective people person, and you will begin to see changes in your reporting relationships.

Consultants have made a lot of money teaching executives how to create "motivational" environments for their employees. The environment that will sustain, however, is the one that the employees create for themselves.  

This website is a continuation of the work that I do with employees that want to learn how to inspire change from the bottom up.  As time passes, I hope to expand this movement into something more than the typical "Organizational Leadership" group of phrasology.  Additionally, I hope to take the tools that I have learned from watching the leaders within my own organizations and use them to help build up others.